A new age, a new journey… and honestly, a completely new kind of birthday for me.
This year’s birthday feels tender, quiet, and filled with a strange mix of gratitude and longing.
Because this is my first birthday without my dad, and also the first one after so much “turbulence” in my life.
To be honest, this year…
saya selalu kecewa dan merasa gagal.
There were days I felt lost, overwhelmed, and unsure of who I was becoming.
I didn’t think I’d ever have to say that sentence.
And I didn’t expect the weight of it to hit me the way it does today.
But here I am turning a year older still learning how to live, how to love, and how to grow in a world where one of my biggest protectors is no longer here with me.
Initially, I planned to celebrate my birthday quietly this year.
Just me, my husband, and my little family.
But when I think back…
I honestly thought I would still be able to celebrate Dad’s birthday next year.
I never imagined this year would be the last year we celebrated his.
That thought alone reminded me that birthdays come only once a year.
And if I can celebrate mine, in whatever way I can, I should.
So this year, I’m choosing something different.
Celebrating with My Church Family
It turns out our church is also celebrating the November birthdays on the 30th.
Cun-cun pula! So I decided to join in to celebrate together with my fellow church members.
I even ordered a cake for everyone from my friend (support small business kan!).
The idea of celebrating my birthday surrounded by worship, community, and warmth feels right for this season of my life.
My Wish for Myself
My wish for myself this year birthday are,
more peace
more strength
more clarity
more wisdom in whatever I did in my life
I want to grow into a woman that I am proud of.
So… happy birthday to me.
Here’s to healing, to becoming better, and to appreciating the people who are still here with me.
Here’s to new beginnings, gentler days, and a heart that continues to grow.
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