In this life, we will face many things.
There will be heartbreaks.
There will be disappointments.
There will be things we desperately want but don’t get.
And there will also be beautiful moments. There will be happiness, laughter, love, new beginnings and memories that we will carry with us for the rest of our lives.
Life is never just one thing.
Over the past few years, I’ve learned one lesson that I didn’t really want to learn:
Sometimes, we just have to move on.
If you follow me on my social media, you know that I experienced a different kind of heartbreak. Not heartbreak because of a relationship. But heartbreak because of a dream.
For a long time, I dreamed of working in Borneo. Borneo isn’t just a place to me. It’s home. It’s where my roots are. And when I finally had the opportunity to work there, a part of me thought, “Maybe this is it. Maybe this is where I’m supposed to be.”
I started imagining a future there. And then life happened for one year. Maybe I forget to mentioned to God in my prayers about the duration. But, I never mad God about the 1 year. Honestly, I did mad to God! I honestly can't accept the dream just crushed in front of my eyes.
Now, I am back in KL.
And honestly, it has been difficult for me to swallow. There is a part of me that is still asking, “Why couldn’t it work out?”
Sometimes we think moving on means simply letting go of a person. But I’ve realized that we also have to move on from places, plans, expectations and versions of ourselves that we once thought would become our future. And that can hurt just as much.
I still miss the idea of working in Borneo. I still think about what my life could have looked like if things had gone differently. But maybe moving on doesn’t mean I have to stop loving that dream.
Maybe I can be grateful that I got to experience it. Maybe I can keep Borneo close to my heart without constantly wishing I was there. Maybe I can accept that something can be beautiful and still be over.
That’s a difficult thing to accept.
But I’m learning. I’m learning that not every dream has to happen exactly the way we imagined. Sometimes, life takes us somewhere we didn’t plan to go. And maybe, eventually, we will understand why. So for now, I’m choosing to move forward.
Not because I don’t care anymore. Not because the dream wasn’t important. Not because I stopped loving Borneo. But because I still have a life to live here.
There are still dreams I can pursue. There are still things I can build. There are still people I love. There are still chapters I haven’t written. And maybe this is what moving on really means.
You don’t erase the past.
You don’t pretend it didn’t matter.
You simply stop letting what you lost prevent you from living what you still have.
Some dreams will stay in our hearts forever. And that’s okay.
Maybe one day, another opportunity will come. But until then, I will keep going. I will make peace with where I am. And I will trust that this chapter, too, has something to teach me.
Sometimes moving on isn’t about forgetting what you wanted.
It’s about learning to be grateful for what you have, while still leaving room for what may come next.
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